Pasha Blackcoat (blackcoat) wrote,
Pasha Blackcoat

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So, <lj-user="ardaniel" / asked the question "what kind of lens would you have, or would you just die?"<P>
My first answer was "I wouldn't take it."
Then, on contemplation, I realized that, should Skuld say "Dude, you're ready", then I prolly am.
<p>So, considering that the lenses give you powers that extend your own, I realized that mine would probably let me see Shatterpoints. Because, I *can* see them already. I just don't know it. And, I tend to exploit them, again, without knowing it. And it *ANGERS* me about myself that I do. I have broken complete strangers without meaning to. I've caused more then one person to run sobbing from the room with my first words to them. The worst part about it, to me at least, isn't that I do it. It's that I feel *satisfied* about having *done* it. And I don't do it to random people all the time, either. I do it to the people that I'm close to. I do it to friends, lovers, family members. And I *still* feel good about watching someone that I care about more then life itself crumble with a few well (or ill) chosen words. I mean, 30 seconds later, I feel like a complete *shit* for having done it, and worse for feeling good about it..but *damn* for that 30 seconds does it make me feel like God.
And I Want It To Stop.
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